I decided to take Rory along to a new toddlers group. He doesn’t attend a nursery and I’m conscious that it’s good for him to socialise with other children. I’d convinced Lizzie to come with me to check it out as I find it quite daunting going to new activities. I needn’t have worried. Rory and Emma toddled off and played with the fab selection of toys. Rory made a beeline for the dolls pram. He loves a pram. He shot off at lightening speed, mowing down several children in his way. He uses the pram as less of an accessory and more of a weapon. Emma spent a considerable amount of time with one leg trapped down the hole of a trampoline but she seemed happy enough.
Another older boy was quite keen on grabbing toys off other children. Rory let it happen once and then formed a strategy. As soon as the boy came to steal the phone off him, he just shut his eyes, held the toy close and sat down until the boy gave up. I liked his style.
Lizzie sighed, “Don’t get me wrong Karen. I like it. But I can’t see a tea trolley”. Lizzie lives for a cup of tea and toddler activities, and she has a fair point. “I know what you are saying. But look at all the great toys! And it’s only £2!” I could sense she wasn’t convinced. And then bingo. Out pops a lady with tea, coffee, biscuits and juice for the kids. Extra joy was injected into the event as we had actual real mugs. No styrofoam here. “Fair enough Karen. I think it’s a winner”.
As Lizzie freed Emma from the trampoline and I prized Rory From the handle of the toy pram we decided it was a success. For £2 you really couldn’t complain. I am looking forward to seeing Rory’s battle skills develop and Lizzie is already looking forward to her next cuppa!
I knew this day would come. I really did. I even talked about in an earlier post. I just wasn’t prepared for it TODAY.
As we were splashing away another Mummy held her baby aloft, exiting the pool declaring “she’s done a poo. I’m sure of it”. The instructor congratulated her on her keen bond with her child. “Well done on spotting it! A Mother just knows, don’t they?” Do they?
The class finished and Rory and I dashed into the shower cubicle. It’s always stressful trying to get him ready after the class so I thought it easier just to whip off his nappy, give him a quick shower and get him dressed back at the poolside. So there I was, trying to adjust the shower to level between scalding and ice and wrestling off his skin tight swim shorts. If only I could just get this last leg out….
It was then it happened. That scene from the film. You know the one.
The force of my nappy removal caused a ricochet effect which sprayed the phantom shit straight up and across Rory and I. Both of us. Head to toe. In actual shit.
I immediately panicked and switched the shower on to full icy cold mode which made Rory go mental and me to drop the shower head which then sprayed water over us as we screamed and clung on to each other in shock.
It literally couldn’t get any worse so I just hosed the worst of it off, shut the door on that cubicle and advised the cleaner that she might want to give the shower “a little disinfect” for good measure.
I threw my clothes on and we got out out of there. I returned to the car and messaged an update to my Mummy friends and Simon who all thought it was hilarious.
Simon is taking Rory swimming in Monday. Let’s just hope he doesn’t put in a repeat performance!
“Is anyone Jiggying tomorrow?” asks Lizzie. The response from the rest of the girls suggest that two of them are. Donna is on holiday, so she has an excuse. Now, for those not familiar with this, “Jiggy Wrigglers” is a parent and baby group which plays loud music whilst an extremely enthusiastic woman jumps about with puppets and toys to entertain the children. The pull for my Mummy group seems to be that it’s often not your typical “baby” music. Apparently a few weeks ago had a space theme which lent itself to some Babylon Zoo and the week prior had dropped in some Prodigy amongst ‘Head, shoulders knees and toes”. This had piqued my interest enough to warrant the £3 charge. Up until now I haven’t attended any baby group I needed to pay for. Purely as I felt there were lots of free groups to go to when he was still small and not really bothered about what was going on. Lizzie had also mentioned that they had a tea hatch. Anywhere which has a “tea hatch” gets my vote! So here I was. It was absolutely mobbed. This was for under 1’s which was a relief. Not too many bambino’s on the move as yet!
I’m in charge Mummy!
Rory sat with his mouth open, staring at the jumping woman in front of him. All I could think was how horrendous it would be to do her job with a hangover. Is there a job worse than this when you are fragile? I would think not. She was great though. Very engaging with every one of the children and full of beans as you would expect of a children’s entertainer.
Would I go every week? I’m not so sure. Will I go this week? Probably. It’s strangely addictive. And it has a tea hatch….